We'll Know We're Doing Right if We're Taking Care of the Children

Every time we have a tragedy like this all the talking heads demand that something be done and it never is. The Republicans blame the lack of prayer in school and the Democrats blame the lack of gun control. Tonight the President called for a more lasting response. At the Newtown Memorial Service he said, "We know we’re always doing right when we’re taking care of (the children)." Could that be a rally cry? Is this something, finally, that we can agree on as a nation? Is there an energy rising from this horrific event that can create unified change where nothing else could?

We don't need either / or - we need both. Why in the hell are assault weapons legal? Whether or not one was used in Newtown, we can start there. The issue of mental illness is a huge one and this woman doesn't know the solution, but she sure paints a powerful picture of the problem. I'll focus here mostly on the culture because, well, I'm a Republican. And because we've had mentally ill people since time began, but they didn't shoot classrooms filled with children. We can gather all the weapons in America, throw them into the ocean and we're still going to have an increasingly decadent, degrading culture impacting our children every minute of every day.

Years ago, before there were blogs, when the only way to communicate ideas to the world was via articles, I wrote one about our nation's dwindling focus on sustaining a culture that is mentally and spiritually healthy for our children. "It seems," I wrote, "That we care more about the environment of the spotted owl than we do that of our children." Several years before the former first lady's book, the title of the article was "It Takes a Village to Raise a Child." And I wasn't talking about a lack of accountability for parents (which was the critique conservatives had of Hilary's book), but an increased accountability for all.

There was a time, for instance, when all the TV networks agreed to have family hours before 9:00 each night where only family-friendly content could be aired. Now at any hour of the day the air waves are filled with content that is violent, provocative, debasing. The violence is nothing like the violence of my childhood. It involves not just blood and killing, but degradation - dehuminization of the victims. Each day through television, video games and the internet, kids are exposed to more sex and violence than I was exposed to in my first (good Lord I keep writing decades here and they're too low) 40 (!) years.

I don't believe that the best parents today can protect their children from experiences that will at best cause them to lose their innocence and at worst invade their soul with a view of other humans as expendable, worthless objects of pleasure with targets on their foreheads. THEY NEED HELP! The raising of good citizens is the most important activity occurring in our nation and we're making their job more difficult with every passing year.

For instance, how about instead of making hard working families pay to protect their children from crap on the internet, we charge those who want to see it? And then find increasingly ironclad ways to secure internet browsing for children. Sure, the kids can find a way around it, but since when is that a reason not to take precautions? Do we leave our doors wide open to our homes because thieves are going to get in no matter how many precautions we take? No, we put up barriers because they deter, slow down, increase the possibility that someone will show up to stop it.

What are all the ways that parents use to raise virtuous, loving citizens? Is it, for instance, sending them to private or home-based schools? Determine those and protect the hell out of them.

Instead of giving in to the increasingly hateful and aggressive secularists and marginalizing people of faith we need to remember that despite all its flaws, a Christian-infused Western Civilization managed to support the raising of some pretty decent societies and individuals over the centuries while Godless, secular civilizations have already been tried and found devastatingly wanting.

Don't we all have some accountability for the environment we've allowed to devolve over the years that Adam Lanza was raised in? Don't we all have a responsibility to demand that it be de-toxified so that instead of chipping away at childen's souls it nurtures and cares for them like the precious future citizens they are? What else can we do? Think. You'll know it's right if we're taking care of the children.

Election Reflection

The election is over, results are in and I'm just now feeling less depressed. I was traveling for business and was gathered with co-workers in a breakfast room at a Comfort Inn in Parachute, CO to hear the results . Since oil and gas folks are generally pulling for Republicans we were all rooting for Romney. We went to our rooms once an Obama win seemed inevitable (despite a false positive from Karl Rove). For the next three days I was surrounded with people who all wanted to talk things through - it was very helpful.

Since I had to facilitate sessions the next two days I was forced to recover quickly. It pressed me toward God, who was more than willing to help.

My thoughts:

- First I realized that a move toward secularism in this country, and one that is profoundly anti-Catholic, may not be inevitable, but it certainly is probable. I felt deeply grateful. Of all the Christians throughout history, I've received the rare privilege of living in a time when both Church leadership and the culture around me supported me in my faith. The culture during the middle ages was Christian, but the Church leadership at that time was corrupt. In the early centruies the Church leadership was the strongest, but the culture was anything but friendly. Thank you, Lord. When I realize what a rare gift I've received, with Popes who heard you clearly, bishops who teach the truth forcefully (and lovingly), and an American culture that respected my faith and supported my values, I can no longer be angry that the gift is disappearing.

- I was able to hide from the "hurricane" named not Sandy but Obama. I pulled within, found God and really knew what Paul meant when he said:

Think of what is above, not of what is on earth. For you have died, and your life is hidden with Christ in God.

I truly believe God cared about the results of this election, but if Christ lived in our times, I also don't believe He would have been obsessed with the process, angry at all that is blue, or despairing at the results. I want to die, with my life hidden in Christ who is perfect, and respond instead of react.

- I will now detach from the process that I obsessed over - in a hopefully humble way rather than an angry detachment. I will turn toward what I can do. Instead of looking to the Supreme Court to reverse Roe v Wade, I'll get training to be a sidewalk counselor. Instead of seeing the HHS mandate reversed, I will continue to demonstrate for religious rights and conscience clauses.

God is good.

Thoughts at the Garden of Hope

I'm in my second hour at the Garden of Hope praying as a part of 40 Days for Life. Several things have struck me while here. First, we're in the 40th year since Roe v Wade. I remember working long hours to defeat Proposition B that sought to legalize abortion in Michigan back in 1972 and how appalled I was in January of the following year when the Supreme Court invalidated all our efforts by making abortion legal during all 9 months in all 50 states. I was devastated. I remember wanting to move to Canada. Here I sit 40 years later still fighting the devastating impact of that decision.

Despite the horrors that people are now aware of, despite ultrasounds that clearly show LIFE, despite many many women who describe the deep pain and scars they bear from their abortions, despite knowing that many people choose abortion because their babies are girls, others are forced into the decision, despite knowing abortions occur at 9 months where the standard procedure is to pull the baby's head out of the birth canal and then STAB HIM OR HER IN THE NECK WITH SCISSORS!!!!!!

Despite all this, here we are with a president who doesn't even support keeping a baby alive who is born via a botched abortion, who promised fewer abortions in his 2008 campaign and in 2012 invites the president of Planned Parenthood to give a keynote speech at his convention, who feels totally confident that showcasing abortion in his campaign will gain him votes. Wake up Democrats. Ask the difficult questions instead of turning a blind eye. Are you willing to look at pictures? Why not? To those who are at least somewhat pro-life but continue to support the Democratic Party - are you willing to face the number of abortions that have occurred under a Democratic president that WOULD NOT have occurred under a Republican? What has to happen to give this issue a face? How can we as a society fill the air waves with commercials to save dogs and cats while close to a million humans lose their lives each year (and we ban commercials that even hint at the benefits of saving them).

And now to another thought that hit me powerfully as I was praying. I wondered how much all the prayers and actions over the years might have saved one very special baby...

whether her mommy might have been influenced by those prayers or possibly impacted by tagging along with her dad and me while we prayed outside abortion clinics over the years... so that years later when she found herself single and pregnant, she took the courageous and difficult road and blessed us and the world with Eleanor Charlotte. And I cried.

My Sister the Author

I'm so proud of my sister who recently e-published the first book of her Saginaw Series. They're sweet stories that take place in our hometown and are filled with familiar places and faces (including my daughter Sarah who starts her own bakery!!).

Here is the review I wrote for Amazon:

I loved the characters in this book. I felt like I knew and liked them right away. I read it out loud to my daughter and we were intrigued from the first sentence. I like the way the author combined the present day with a more nostalgic, sweet, and innocent time of long ago (I could tell because I'm a native of Saginaw and recognized the long-gone Bertie's Bakery and Webber House). The result is a story for today's kids that shows them a life they can choose to have if they put away the video games! I also like the integration of spirituality into the book. It's a part of the girls' lives and never seems contrived or off-putting. The life the author presents is inviting in every way, from the beautiful relationships that include friendship, romance and an abiding sense of community to the loving but real families. I highly recommend this book, especially as a read aloud with your daughter or granddaughter!

Go here to order it (only 99 cents!). And here to download a Kindle for PC's (free!). Congratulations, sis! Love you! :)

The Future?

"I expect to die in bed, my successor will die in prison and his successor will die a martyr in the public square" -Cardinal George of Chicago

To have my gut feel spelled out like a prophecy is a little disconcerting. We're living in difficult times.

Laughter of the Purest and Most Liberating Kind

A beautiful meditation from my favorite online prayer spot, Sacred Space.

"A physicist once gave me the ‘Ladybird’ version of electrons. He emphasised that reality as we know it is marvellously interconnected. Electrons at either end of the universe vibrate in synchronicity with one another. ‘So true is this’ he said ‘that we can’t understand anything by itself, but only in its connectedness. read more... Everything is somehow in touch with everything else. And everyone is linked with everyone else, past, present and future. This means that only when the last of us has been gathered in will we know the full story of the human race. Think of history as being a bit like a cosmic joke: while you’re telling a joke, people are puzzled. They wonder how the story is going to work out. Only with the punch line do they get the point and laugh.’ So with the human story: we must be patient. God indeed exists, but so also does dreadful evil. God works within what is bad to bring good out of it. We see this in the Passion with the eyes of faith. What was the worst of Fridays becomes Good Friday only because of the love involved. This love cuts across the downward spiral of evil, sin and death and it opens up to us God’s world, a new world of freedom and love. At the end we will see how love has transformed all the sorrow and pain and tragedy of our story. Only then will the laughter begin, laughter of the purest and most liberating kind. This laughter will be led by the three divine Persons who always intended that things would end well and who laboured mightily to bring this about. ‘Blessed are you who weep now, for you will laugh’ (Luke 6:21)."

And one more thing - I bet this caused laughter of the purest and most liberating kind - a true vocation in the making.

Happy Easter

At Easter, on the morning of the first day of the week, God said once again: “Let there be light”. The night on the Mount of Olives, the solar eclipse of Jesus’ passion and death, the night of the grave had all passed. Now it is the first day once again – creation is beginning anew. “Let there be light”, says God, “and there was light”: Jesus rises from the grave. Life is stronger than death. Good is stronger than evil. Love is stronger than hate. Truth is stronger than lies. The darkness of the previous days is driven away the moment Jesus rises from the grave and himself becomes God’s pure light. Pope Benedict's Easter Vigil Homily

Holy Thursday

I sat in the quiet church as the clock inched closer to midnight. It was Holy Thursday and the tradition of “spending one hour” with the Lord was coming to a close. The Cathedral had been open since seven, with people from every walk of life coming to kneel before the tabernacle and try, like the apostles, to stay awake as a comfort to Jesus. Did He know, more than 2000 years ago in that garden that we would be here tonight? Did He glean some small comfort from knowing it? Surely that is not outside the possibility for the Son of God.

As I sit in my pew I imagine myself in the garden – the exact garden that I visited just this past year with my husband and daughter as we toured the Holy Land. Somehow that reach across space many months before, enabled a stunning reach across time tonight and suddenly I was there. Sitting in the garden, watching, waiting. The wind howling outside my Tulsa church became the sound effects for the dark garden, illuminated only with a large full moon that any other night might look pleasant, but this night looked somehow ominous. The Asian man who was sitting in the pew in front of me, saying his prayers out loud, transformed from being an irritant to a part of the bustling and whispering of the other apostles. Here I am, Lord. More than any time in my life, aware that I would have fallen asleep as the apostles did that night, just as I know now that I, too, would have denied you three times. But tonight, in my Tulsa-Jerusalem, knowing how much you need my presence, I can remain awake and gaze, riveted, upon the image of your agony. Just sit. Be here. Knowing that you know.

Silent No More

Such a nice relaxing day! I pretty much gave myself the day off. It started with our scheduled time at St. John's adoration, followed by Mass, then Sarah and I went to a pro-life breakfast at St. Madelene's where we saw old friends and met new ones. We heard Georgette Fornay speak who founded the Silent No More organization - the group behind the "I Regret My Abortion" signs that can be seen at rallies. I remember when abortion was being sold to the nation (literally - did you know that Hugh Hefner funded the lower court costs for Roe v. Wade? Sex without consequences is imperative for the Playboy philosophy to work.). The promise was that child abuse would decrease since every child would be a wanted child. Here are the national Child Abuse Report statistics since 1976 (Roe v. Wade was decided in 73):

In case you're wondering if it was reporting that increased and not the abuse, here are the statistics for the number of child deaths per day due to child abuse or neglect going back to 1995.

So could it be possible that "every child being a wanted child" was outweighed by the effect abortion had on how we view our "ownership" of that small life? If I am able to make a decision to terminate my pregnancy, what does that, on a deep level, tell me about my power over that life? Once born, do I suddenly view my power differently just because the law says I should?

I Love Families

I love everything about families (OK, almost). It was one of God's most creative and sweet ideas. Here's a site with 50 outstanding family photos. Some of my favorites: